9879 hits as of writing this.

The one who gets the 10,000th hit gets a cookie.

So this blog is to mark a new era, marked by my change of avatar.. This era is also a new beginning. No longer will the world be ruled by bloodthirsty humans. It will, instead, be ruled by bloodthirsty gerbils. Of course, the other rodents will not be left out. You see, as the mediator for the new era, I have all of the details.

Gerbils are the emperors of the world. Everything lies under their command.

Rabbits, otherwise known as bunnies, will be rulers of not nations, but whole continents. The snowshoe hare has volunteered to rule the penguins in Antarctica.

Hamsters will rule each and every nation in Africa.

Shrews will rule nations in Asia.

Rats will rule North America.

Field mice will rule countries in Europe.

Last, but not least, guinea pigs will rule South America.

Of course, Australia and Antarctica are left out because they don't need two rulers when ruled by a supreme bunnies.

And rodents have also formed an alliance with marsupials. Cities will be ruled by koalas, kangaroos, and porcupines.

It has now been decided that cats and dogs may no longer be kept as pets. Instead, humans will be kept as pets for whales and geckos. Obel must be pretty happy.

The Geico gecko is also serving pancakes and barbecue sauce to the pitiful humans who have now moved to live within trees. Unable to climb, monkeys laugh at them, and end up cutting down all of their trees so they no longer have anywhere to live but the water.

Thus is the end of mankind.

Of course, the gerbils have given me full authorization to do as I like, and I can handpick the one who fulfills the 10k hits I'm required to have in order to complete my mission. The rest of you fools will live in burned grass fields and sea caves.

So, race to the 10,000th hit. The winner gets a cookie, and a life he will always treasure.

Mediator of the World Order of Rodents and Marsupials (WORM),

Kilin