Forkin Awsmoe!

Posted by Charlie Carlo on May 22, 2015, 7:27 p.m.

So for the longest time, I've made crappy games I call Awsmoe games. Originally, it started as a parody of the quality of games you'd find on the Yo-Yo Games Sandbox (albeit better programmed), but over time it evolved into its own art form.

I rarely spend longer than an afternoon on these games; none of them are serious and most of them feature midi music from old console games.

Prepare your butts.

SPACE DULE

They say nobody could survive naked in the vacuum of space, but that doesn't mean you can't put up a fight. This game is the ultimate in zero-gravity, screen-looping space combat.

CONTROLS: Left Mouse to shoot.

ORFAN FITER

Who knows what is possessing these orphans to do combat with a machine-gun wielding polar bear, but they made a big mistake.

Hold out for as long as you can, and if you start to feel bad about blasting orphans, just remember, polar bears are endangered, orphans aren't.

CONTROLS: WASD to move, Left Mouse to shoot.

MAXTER

You know those "art games"? Those games that are always indie, have little to no gameplay, and exist to make you as depressed as the designer? This is my art game, its the fabulous story of Maxter the bipedal rectangle. The only way to win is to not play at all. It's fuckin' deep, right?

CONTROLS: Right and Left to move.

PORKY'S GREAT ADVENTURE

In an age of floating demons, one man (or beveled rectangle) prepares to do the impossible; to fight against all odds in a recurring nightmare of tongues and lasers and blood. Join him.

CONTROLS: Left Mouse to menu, Arrows to move, Space to shoot.

RICK AND MICK

Cooperation is the only way to survive in this post-apocalyptic shootout. Rick and Mick are the only survivors of the invasion of the shadow people. Supercharged by beta-carotene, they must survive against waves and waves of deadly enemies.

CONTROLS: Mouse to menu.

Player 1: WASD to move, F to shoot, G to place trap.

Player 2: Arrows to move, 0 to shoot, 1 to place trap.

APPLE CLICKER INFERNO EDITION

I got into an argument with my friend about the effort and skill involved in making a game, even in game maker. In a vain attempt to prove me wrong, he spent 3 hours dicking around with a tutorial on how to make a game where you click on apples. I made a better one, in less time, with no bugs… okay well a different kind of bugs.

CONTROLS: Left Mouse to click apples, Right Mouse to dispatch suicide ants.

THRILLA IN MANILLA

No, not that Thrilla in Manilla. This is a man named the Thrillaman, who wears exclusively Manilla suits. He cannot be stopped on his quest for revenge, and he's quite adept at throwing boomerangs.

CONTROLS: Right Mouse to throw, WASD to move, Space to get in vehicle .

AGE OF SWORDERY

Have at thee, knave! Fight for the King's honour in this simulator of chivalrous combat.

CONTROLS: Left to move left (otherwise, you move right), Z to reverse swing, X to swing.

ALSO: ESC exits all of the games.

--.DOWNLOAD.--

Enjoy.

But seriously don't play these they're awful.

Comments

Charlie Carlo 9 years, 7 months ago

I've never seen that game before but it looks like it's really hard.

And me and Kilin were just talking about how the knight game, in concept, is similar to that 50 Duel Knight game Panzer was making, except there's no unique bosses.

Fuck kafeithekeaton.

Acid 9 years, 7 months ago

I once challenged myself to make an RTS in 3 hours and it ended up being a 1D playing field where you sent units against the other base. To play, you click the baby button to go steal babies, choose the units you'd like to raise the babies as, and just scroll back and forth watching the units push left and right.