Ok, so i'm really bad at blogging. Its hard to convince myself people care what I have to say, but I figured I might as well just throw some stuff out there.

The fall semester is finishing up, and I'm glad to be done with it. Calc 3, Diff eq, Engineering physics, and Statics/dynamics was a bit more intensive course load than I expected, and that compounded with personal issues and my work on the formula engineering team means that I'll be lucky to scrape a 3.0 out of this semester. which is bad, because I need at least a 3.0 to keep my scholarship. Honestly, I feel like I should be panicking, but lately I just haven't really been able to care.

To go off on a tangent, what does depression feel like? It's weird to think "I might be depressed", but sometimes I feel it might be true. I can't work up the energy to even get out of bed some days, and I just kinda laze around. The only thing I can focus on for more than 30 min is drawing, and I'm not even that good! I guess I've always kinda been this way, but I've always chalked it up to 'extreme laziness' and I usually managed to convince myself to be productive just to upkeep my appearance.

Blegh, enough complaining. Here are some things I've managed to get done on the days when I'm not a useless sack of shit:

Formula SAE

The formula SAE engineering team is a student run racing team that my university sponsors. Every year we design, build, and race a car against other schools worldwide. I'm not particularly interested in racing, but the team is one of the biggest engineering challenges my school offers, so my huge ego kinda convinced me I should do it. Honestly, its kicking my ass, but my ego again prevents me from quitting.

Right now we are smack in the middle of build season, which means every week is a new deadline for a part or jig that I need to have ready. My section is suspension, and I 'specialize' in actuation, so I'm basically in charge of making sure the car doesn't bottom out or shake the shit outta the driver.

I'll upload some pictures of this years design, and the parts I've made so far. (but dont tell anyone, im not sure if the design is supposed to be shared yet! >_>)

Art stuffs

I'm not a very good artist, but I'd like to be. for some reason I have this obsession with creating things, (i guess most here on 64d are the same way).. In the past, its always been mechanically oriented, I wanted to invent machines and create programs, and I still do want to do that, but I find that I don't really like the way those things look. I can appreciate a well coded game, and the efficiency of a well designed machine (omg have I ever mentioned how much I love the lathe?? Its the only machine that can be used to create all the parts that its made of. isnt that crazy?) But I've never thought they were 'pretty'.

Anyway, I picked up a bamboo only to find that my computer is having some kind of issues with the drivers, which i've been too lazy to figure out, so I've been doodling on paper instead of taking notes in class. A lot of them suck, but I've been pretty happy with some of my newer ones.

Before you judge, yes im stuck in an 'anime phase' (its so much easier to draw) and I mainly draw girls. Idk why, I just dont want to draw guys, and they always turn out too angsty when I do.

wall of images:

And finally, some digital art that I've managed to actually get done. I really want to do more of this in the future.

That's really all I got, I wish I had some programming things to show off, but I havent had much time, and when I did have time, I was in one of my useless slumps. I've got a project that I need to get done over this break though, so maybe ill have something to share.

Sorry if I rambled and stuff! have a nice day