Yes, this is a cry for attention. I don't really think I need it, but apparently, I'm just the center for all bad news in the world. Er, not really. But I have learned one thing today.
Now, if you don't like people complaining, just leave now, because I'm pissed.Anyways. So, people who know me would never guess that I'm sad and depressed a lot. I am. It's hard to believe, because I mask it well enough. And you know what I do when I'm depressed?I write music.. Yes, I do. And what do I write music for? So people can pay attention to my music, and perhaps be a bit emphatic for my pain. So, here's the problem.My friend is having break up problems with his so-called girlfriend. I can understand that that's depressing, yes. But, the interesting thing is this: He wrote a song about it. And, you know what? He got mad at me for not being emphatic.Yet EVERY time I showed him one of my songs, you know what he had to say about them?"Epic."No empathy at ALL. Just epic. EPIC. There's no care about the pain that I went through to write those. I'm depressed half of the time in my life. He has problems with his girl, and suddenly, he's the fucking most important thing ever?I really do invite him to just try being depressed for as long as I usually am. Let me list a few reasons WHY I'm depressed.1.) I feel worthless in society. Not like it matters.2.) I'm partially a nihilist. Fun.And, here's the clincher. 3.) I can't get a girlfriend to HAVE problems with. (pwnt? yes.)So I honestly think he should just shut his fucking headhole until he's able to go through the pain I am. And I doubt he ever will. I swear, such fucking hypocritical mayhem.Fuck.Anyways, complaining over. Maybe.Other than that bullshit, my day was pretty much normal. Standardized testing, you know, boring shit. I swear, I couldn't concentrate too well. I don't like testing too much.Hm. I think that's about it. I don't really know. Today was boring. And not reaffirming for my psyche. I have no clue why.And if you just read this blog, and deny its existence…I will hunt you down.You have a keyboard. Use it.~MahFreenAmeh~
http://www.suturesound.com/stwpt/tracks/0317_dont_feel_bad.mp3
Ouch, that sucks. I've been depressed too - but instead of writing music, I sprite and code. Most things never see the light of day, never are shown to anyone. Then, sometimes, I go back to that folder, where those bits and pieces of things reside, pull something out, and work on it more. Sometimes it turns into something beautiful.
Its how I do most of my work.Haha. Kenon, you're right. That's the price we pay for being superior. Flashback, fun.
Sounds fun, DesertFox. I write lyrics, play the guitar, and draw, usually. Sometimes I'll code to get rid of anger, or write a story. I don't know, it depends on my mood.I too have depression as well as anger issues. The latter is the reason I practice martial arts, the former… I'm still working on.
@Flashback: it IS better than being shot in the face.
Whee. I've never had one either. Which is why I like saying that my friends who have had them should really try not ever having one. Then I realize they can't, and laugh. I do have some anger issues, but I easily control them via meditation.
Yeah I tried meditation once, but for me, nothing beats punching someone in the face during a sparring match.