Falling Off The Earth

Posted by NeutralReiddHotel on Aug. 17, 2014, 1:51 a.m.

I'm pretty upset at myself at how badly I've been treating friendships for the past few years. Ever since I was a little kid, I've always wanted to make friends out of loneliness. Never have I ever been like "oh you know what, I really like this person but I'm not going to be their friend because I'm to lazy to put in effort." I mean, that doesn't even make sense… if you like someone (guy or girl) you'll want to hang out with them, talk to them, do things together… I remember the first person I ever chatted with on this site was mageknight53! And it was over MSN Messenger! But now… I don't want to do it. The drive that made me want to write endless blogs here, made me want to put in effort to hang out with people outside this site IN PERSON, the drive that told me "I don't know what's going to happen today but I'm going to try and make it fun for me and others" is not there. Why?

I'm not sure, it could be because I'm living with a girl and my best friend roommate. Having two persons that live with me vs. the isolated household I grew up with is a very different experienced I'm still getting used to. It's nice to wake up to a place I like, with people I like. It's not stressful, or lonely.

Yet, because I don't feel AS lonely as I used to, I don't actively try to make new friends.. or keep old ones. I'll take you guys for example… it's VERY easy for me to type up a blog and respond to yours. I type so fast I might as well be speaking.. yet I don't do it because I don't feel like I've been properly maintaining friendships here, hence, like there's no reason to come here and update on what's going on when I don't offer you guys the same courtesy.

I'm banking on that this might just be a phase of my life… I'm not exactly free of problems just because I enjoy where I live. I wish I could pour my heart out to you guys but right now I feel that the less I say the better… maybe later on I can come back and talk about them that way this rambling post makes sense.

By the way! I'm still working on my cursed black game. it's becoming quite lovely… here i'll show you!

http://files.64digits.com/Reiddsan/Screenshot%20from%202014-08-17%2000:48:35.png

http://files.64digits.com/Reiddsan/Screenshot%20from%202014-08-17%2000:48:28.png

http://files.64digits.com/Reiddsan/Screenshot%20from%202014-08-17%2000:48:21.png

I couldn't show you the Ghost's status because I have a glitch to fix tomorrow morning. see you when i next post guys!

Comments

Quietus 10 years, 4 months ago

i was wondering what happened to you. thanks for being so transparent. :v screenshots look good, i'm as excited for Cursed Black as ever! :)

Kenon 10 years, 4 months ago

Don't feel bad about falling off the face of the Earth!

I do it all the time. I have literally cut ties with tons of people. I'm a terrible friend for long periods of time, but I don't care!

No but seriously, it can suck to be in a state where you realize you've left people behind, but I mean, everyone does it. Don't feel bad about it.

Quietus 10 years, 4 months ago

yeah Kenon does it all the- holy fuck Kenon?!

Acid 10 years, 4 months ago

I have one friend - everyone else is an acquaintance. I used to have a ton but I don't have the time to waste caring way more about others than they do about you.

I mean, I'm still cordial, but I don't hesitate to let people know where they stand.

:D