If a few programmers for the Atari could do it right, why can’t this retard?

Since the game was so bad I can barely even tell what its about. Basically I think it is supped to start out as one of those scene in Star Trek where everybody is like “Captain, were taking fire, what do we do?â€?, only it was done in a horrible way. The game starts out with some annoying ship image growing bigger or something, (the creator probably thought it was an awesome effect and invited his friends over to have a hand party while watching it), after the ship image is this horribly drawn cockpit with this annoying pop-up message dialog, shitty attempt to recreate the into to Zero Wing only with pop-up messages.

Then the game starts, everything is going fine, until…

Bullets

Wow, are those bullets coming out of the back of my ship?

There appears to be no turret, so the guns must be at the front of the ship. No why are they going out the back? Hmm that makes no sense. Another problem that is easily noticed is that rockets follow your mouse, shoot a bunch of rockets, and when enemies show up just move your mouse over them, there, that was easy. Well you’re not going to get much of a chance to do that, cause directly after you kill the first 3 enemies nothing happens, I sat there for 5 minutes like a jackass waiting for something to happen, anything! Another huge problem i notice is that the maker claims that space has boundaries, he shows this by having you bounce off of the end of the room. Come on man! Asteroids practically showed you what to do, wrap the objects around the room so it seems to be never ending.

lets see what the creator says about the game:

Maiden Voyage is an immersing Shooter, where you fight multiple alien races bent on destroying you, and each other! Take command of The Iliad, the most advanced human warship ever built, stranded in another galaxy. With 4 different weapons, and more than a dozen different types of enemies, the game will keep challenging your method of playing!Fly, Shoot, Ram, and blow your way through alien ships in this lengthy and stunning Sci-Fi adventure!

You know, I’m half Greek, I don’t appreciate my culture being made fun of with an extremely shitty game. It also claims dozens of diffrent types of enemies, there were 3 enemies, and all were the same type. Another keyword here is Lengthy, hmm Well considering my awesome skill, I can beat all 3 enemies in 3 seconds, wow, go me!In other words, this game was massive fail, but hey, you can shoot bullets out the side of your ship, isn’t that fucking awesome?

Wow, this game amazed me.

It was an utter piece of shit, now before you delete this comment lets take in account that I'm better then you and I'm not gonna give this an official rating since you care so damn much about your rating. If I did rate it would be a 3/10

Now lets dissect this game:

Pros:

None, glad we cleared that up, well it works better then your last game which was an utter piece of shit.

Cons:

22 mb file size: Well lets see, that sound is completely unnecessary especially since it sounded like a rip off of the music from Full Throttle an old SNES game, oy that music was annoying and repetitive as hell. I could made the same sounds you did in less then 2 mb.

Background not seamless: This is distracting and very noticeable.

Graphics: Okay the inside ship sprites sucked, the ship sprites were ripped, and after you beat level one, some weird cloud thing comes up, it hurt my eyes and annoyed the fucking hell out of me. Another problem was the text box thing, just cause you can make a fucking gradient dose not mean that you need to use it.

Space: Space is a dimension, lets call it the 4th dimension, now you ever see one of those 4 dimensional images? It loops inside itself, now apply this to your game, just use move_wrap for fucks sake, give it the felling of infinity, since when can you bounce off of invisible walls in space?

Game info: This is for Serprex, Game info is not the place for instructions or any medium of information unless its an example, everything should be neatly structured in a nice room, look at Varia, it has one of the nicest menu systems I have ever seen, and its very simplistic.

Intro Sequences: Really, I could care less, I'm just happy I could skip those horrible graphics with space. Nobody really cares about the whole Stargate thing unless the game actually follows the story instead of going "Oh no, enemy battle cruisers, to your stations. Go go go!".

Bullets: Ah, we've run into the problem of bullets AGAIN. See the guns are in front of the ship, so bullets should shoot to the front. Bullets coming out of your ass make no sense when you are facing forward, really, its not that hard to fix and there are a number of ways to fix it. Also the bullets were fucking huge, since when did a little laser beam become as big as your fucking ship? Also the bullets were jumpy due to the speed being too big, make them instant so you don't have to worry about any of that stuff.

There, that took a good 5 minuets to give you my sincere output, just PM me if you need any help with ideas. And do me a favor, don't just edit this game and submit it again like you did with your last one, all you're gonna get is another wall o' text from me.

-Sk8m8trix

P.S. I'm saving this post, so don't even think about deleting it.