chaos legion ost <3

The Mahout

I rode on an elephant before. It was quite nifty. I went to a third world country. I'd consider it fourth world since they don't seem to be focused on improving or industrializing at all.

Oh, Cambodia. You're so full of corruption and sheer idiocy.

I must admit that I found some of the girls there hot. My tastes have changed in accordance to the flow of time though. Girls of below fair complexion rank much lower in my list of girls I'd hit.

Ah! How Creepy!

Woah, boys. I know the license plate #s of both of the nameless girl's parent's cars. Creepy, but… I'm rather bored when I'm walking. Just happening to see her. Eh. I gotta do something.

That being said, I should strive to be less creepy. I must make her more accepting of me by the end of the week so I can go to her house and play Brawl with her friends and I guess, her. Love is cruel. Loving inhibits you from playing the Wii at some girl's house because you like that girl. Though, I haven't actually implied that I still like her to her in a few weeks.

cha

Indian and Celtic ethnic music are complete ownage.

War of the Japanese: Siege of Neo Fushimi Castle

He removes his hand from his face. Lustful black curls upon his face and down his shoulders. His ornate helmet is surrounded by gold. It shimmers as a sudden rain drop drips down. Gently being guided along the curves of the headpiece, it slips onto his noise. The gray blister begins to excrete transparent pus into the sea, also gray and murky. His hand is now on his side. His gold bracer slides; it lengthens over his wrist and hand. Its opening shows no evidence of his flesh but only darkness in an engraving an inch tall and 2 inches wide. In an instant, it emits a sharp crackle as a blade of vindictive sharp light is given birth. The parrot on his shoulder flies down. From its eyes, we see the whole junk. The man is sitting atop a mast. Be careful not to fall.

“We are pirates. I need not conform to the populace’s opinion of safety. I live not for them. I pillage them! And if they look good enough, perhaps I’ll give something back to them… I’m a pirate of taste after all. Wait, what was that?â€?

“Oh, dear! Oh, dear!â€?

Small red fog dissipates from the man as he falls from the mast. In a second, we see him on his back. He stands back up and dusts off the area of the gunshot wound on his chest.

“That… was rather unpleasant. Now, I have to climb aaaall the way back up there. I’ll probably get shot again, but nature is a beautiful woman. You just gotta see every inch of her and that’s when you know: you got to hit that.â€?

“Hit that! Hit that!â€?

The man continues dusting off his wound.

“This stain doesn’t seem to be coming off. It’s such a turn off too. So black compared to this beautiful gold and blue, ja?â€?

“Ja! Ja!â€?

The man sniffs. It’s hearty, dissonant, a sniff of a true man. He places his rigid large right hand on the rope to the mast’s heavenly top. The blade of light disappears as his bracer turns to its original position on his left arm. He places the other hand on the rope. His mother fed him well with the whales of Japan 8 years ago when they were a common occurrence via the grandiose technique known as cloning. Nowadays, something happened. He sniffs again, but atop the mast. He leans over to peer in the distance. Steel warships of the sky approach. Their emblems tell of a familiar tale to any man not living in the West. It’s the imperialistic Neo-Pan Americans! He can hear their high pitched war cries a mile away. He was distracted before. This man is no supporter of Neo Neo Imperialism. Ask his parrot.

“This is a fortress. Those imperial Mexican bigots think they can take my fortress!? This is a castle! Built originally as a retirement home for Hashiba Hideyoshi, but a castle nonetheless! Prepare, you Mexicans. This is…

NEO FUSHIMI CASTLE. Cue the fireworks!�

The man suddenly lifts off and onto the deck and pulls down a switch. Like magic, fireworks appear from the sea. Amazing as that may sound, it was a common practice a few years back and now, rather corny. This man is not a man of society though. He conforms to no man but himself. That may be why his crew are all at the bottom of the ocean. They dared to mutiny. They forgot he had a beam saber. That was understandable. He was always dressed in elaborate samurai attire from even before the Sengoku era. Again, he was an unorthodox man. His strength allowed him to grow oddly since he would not need to fear ridicule. Instead, the people feared his ridicule. The one man crew sighed though. He had to climb back atop the mast.

"Henshin.â€? He shouted. Every wrinkle on his face appeared as the word roared out of his giant devil’s mouth.

The giant junk rose, revealing that it was merely a keep. The castle was humongous and quite Japanese. It was a Japanese castle after all. The windows of the castle turned, revealing primitive cannons from the Age of Discovery. The keep itself flipped, revealing an arsenal of these slow cannons. The mast itself remained still. The magnificent man stood there, drowning in his hubris.

“You are such a bloody loner! What would mum say, eh, boy? Where’s the morals, the decency, the English in ya!? Beautiful day to sink your castle all the same, innit though?â€? shouts a man from the Mexican warship.

“English in me, Lloyd? You’re the one commanding an armada of those stinky tanned… tannies!â€?

“Reminds me of that chap that told meh, ‘But racism ill exists in our society now.’ I guffawed. Then I slept with his mother. Quite nice. But what can be said of you? You have the looks! Indeed. Mighty fine, chap, but ya lack the skills, companero.â€?

“You don’t realize our mother was Japanese, do you?â€?

“I like to pretend not to. The English was far superior.â€?

“I prefer the Japanese. You know, because I’m proud of my country! Wait, Neo Japan’s still a country, ja?â€?

“Afraid not, lad. The world’s looking mighty Mexican and there ain’t nothing ja can do ‘bout it, boy. Give in. We can use someone like you. Otherwise, I’ll tell them ‘matalo’â€?

“You don’t scare me with your buddies! I played enough Dynasty Warriors in my time to know that those foot soldiers mean nothing.â€?

“Matalo.â€?

“Oh no. I’m sinnnnnnnnking. BaaalahahahlaaddbababfgfggsfgfHGUDGSF!â€?

!

I just realized I'm member 1100. I thought I'd be like 1124 or something but it's exactly 1100.

I guess that's neat.