As an artist:
My anatomy has gotten pretty goshdarndagnabbitly decent. My grasp on color usage needs work, as well as my use of perspective. I also need to do more background work because everything I draw lacks one.But I would say that I've come far since I started here.As a game designer:I've finally come to terms with the fact that I'll never be a part of commercial game design. I mean, I've known this for a while but I kinda wanted to SAY it to cement that into my brain. I always know that I'll be messing around as a hobbyist and an artist, but I feel as if I pursue any of it as a career, not only will I not go very far, but it will kill the fun as well.As a student:I want to do my work really bad. I honestly do. It's not even so much that I'm procrastinating anymore. It's like my mind and body will not allow me to do my school work. I try so hard. I answer questions in school. I do the work while I'm there, but outside of school I cannot force myself to do homework no matter what I do. I set alarms and I wake up early. I don't know what to do. I believe I may have ADD but everyone believes that about themselves. It's just an excuse. It's not about the grades - I have a B average, though grades have no meaning to me - it's just the fact that I want to be a truly decent student. I don't want to just pass through the system because I'm intelligent and clever. I want to fell like I earned it. And it's hard.As a person:I don't hate life as much. Like I posted on Rez's blog, once I realized that EVERYTHING was meaningless, it made life so much more bearable. I'm a Christian and my morals are important, but death is really all that matters. Especially in my religion. Death, and how you die, is what truly says something about yourself. What I do, or don't do, and what you say to me really doesn't matter. Death is the epitome of life.I know it may sound morbid, but that realization has brought me a lot of peace and happiness. Don't sweat the small stuff! :)Oh and the engagement is going great! A medium sized, midsummer wedding. I'm so excited.
Ahh, riveting story old chum.
Lol jk, really, it's only YOU that can break the chain of procrastination outside of what you HAVE to do. But don't force yourself, that only makes you want to stray further. I'm a pro at holding myself back, but I've fought through a lot.As for the person part. I don't necessarily hate life, but if I knew I was to die in the next five minutes, I probably wouldn't care. And I dropped God as 'it' did nothing but use up my time on empty prayers.(is agnostic) I'll see it when I see it haha.I totally relate to this.
You know you don't have to work for a company to make money while enjoying designing games, right? There are plenty of successful indie developers.
Bring us pics of the wedding :o
Will do, Ferret. Will do.
I'm contemplating webcasting it. :PI have more than a few people who want to come but I don't have room/they'll be in other countries so I think that's what I'll do for them.What kind of bull?