EDIT: Here, non-readers. Have something I made:

*Disclaimer*: Wrote this at about 2AM if my other disclaimer is anything to go by. Beware.

Five days, as of writing this, 'til the competition begins. And once again I find myself having to fight the urge to 'give up'.

But I can't, because I've told a lot of people (My family, for starters) that I'm entering with the intention to win.

The $400 first place prize is attractive too.

So I'm not going to give up, no matter what.

But between now and the beginning of the competition, I had to find something to do. I've frozen Ascendancy's development for a while, because I can't focus on that while trying to formulate ideas for my entry.

So I spent today doing something else: Creating a workspace for this project.

My first thoughts this morning were to treat this competition as if I was receiving a development contract from somebody (Because there is a tangible prize involved).

So I turned my desk into something resembling order as opposed to the mass of papers, coffee mugs and old DDR3 chips strewn left, right and center.

I've papered part of my wall with blank printer paper, intended as a huge to-do list. I have two scratchpads next to my keyboard, a ream of printer paper for concept art on the other side of my desk, my scientific calculator on hand, a load of pens and pencils, and two plastic files for keeping my loose papers in.

Organized.

With the exception of my other desk… top. Once again, a multitude of icons have crept onto it again, which proves distracting. So I'm going to do the usual thing: Clear them all with the exception of the dedicated folders I create for the comp.

Any programs I need to access are usually accessed via ControlPad.

I'm as geared up as I can be. I might set up my scanner again, in case I want to scan my concept art for you to see (I have been sketching). But that ancient piece of junk (A Canoscan LiDE-something) takes forever to scan a black-and-white image at low DPI, so… I probably won't.

Time is on my side…

Not a good thing either; it means I'm at a loose end. Heck, I've been at a loose end for two years now. Finding work has proved impossible so far, and now I've gotten to the point where I'm pestering the local businesses on a monthly basis.

So that leaves me in this situation: I'm stuck living with my grandparents/parents (Two houses on one plot of land, hence the reason the ADSL router is 40/50 Meters away), I can't afford to upgrade my PC, I can't afford my own internet bills, and I can't buy myself a pair of socks this winter…

OK, I lied about the last one; I have a bit of money. I get by clothing-wise on the bits of cash I scrape in repairing PC's. I've got quite a good 'word-of-mouth' thing going on here. Of course, I undercut all the major repair centers (Matrix, for one) by not charging a fee for looking at the PC, only charging for any repairs I actually make (Part fees are factored into the final price with a ~5% markup).

I'm also making a list of potential businesses to approach with the intention of creating a website for them; these are all places that should have websites, but don't because I live in a small-ish town populated primarily either by technophobes or the I-have-a-Wordpress-blog-does-that-count lot.

Most of the potential customers are estate agents. If I do strike a deal, it's going down on some legally binding paper first, to cover me. Not taking any chances there.

So yeah, I have lots of free time (Fixing PC troubles at the volume I work at doesn't require much time; you see, I fix the PC so that it won't break again too soon, or at least I try to. So my regular customers aren't all that regular. Only three jobs so far this year).

Which means that I should be able to pump it all into the competition. :3

Planning ahead

This goes way beyond the competition, to my personal ambitions.

Amusingly, when I was 10, I had to write a short paragraph titled "What I want to be when I grow up". It went something like this:

I recall a visit to the school psychologist shortly afterwards; but pause and reflect on the joys of being young for a while.

Now my goal is slightly less ridiculous, but note that this is a long term life goal, the type of thing I probably won't pull off, or might if I get rich quick:

I want to start a school that focuses and specializes in Computer Science, including the hardware aspects and game development. Crazy, huh? :3

In a shorter time-frame, I intend to find work of some kind, whether it be freelance, a mundane 9-to-5 job, or something in the GD industry.

I also intend to attend University at some point later in life (It's never too late to learn, if you're willing to try). Specifically, I want to study Computer Science, because the advanced side of the subject lures me (Even though I have a problem with Calculus. Why the heck can I learn Algebra, Linear Algebra, Geometry and Trigonometry with minimal trouble but find myself hitting a solid brick wall with Calculus??)

An Anecdote from the lands of Linux

So, somebody comes around for a visit, and tells me that they've come up with the best password ever for their craplaptop's OS, but decided that I should test it, just in case. I agreed. Here is a transcription, from vague memory, of what happened on the screen (Distro was Fedora 12, GRUB bootloader. Easy as pie).

There is a lesson to be learned here, my good people: Your computer is never completely secure from an on-site attack. Of course, you can always go paranoid and enable the POST password feature on some BIOS chips (Can be circumvented with a BIOS reset), and even use GRUB's password feature (Can be circumvented by using a Live-bootloader on a USB drive), but really, don't let people get at your PC in the first place.

And especially never tell somebody that your system is 'unbreakable', because immediately you'll plant a psychological seed in their minds telling them subconsciously to find a way to circumvent your security measures and break it.

Anyway, this brings up something that's been a constant annoyance lately. Why the heck do people automatically assume that just because I'm a programmer I'm now also a potential hacker? Seriously, that guy with the password, somebody asking me if I know how to get 'free internet' (I wish), and countless people asking me if I knew how to crack games (I kinda do, but don't wish to waste my life drowning in disassembled instructions).

And that's just the 'programmer' bit. If anybody catches wind of the game development side of things… "Y U No make Grand Quake Scrolls 9001? LOL" from the highschool population is my fare.

Then, if they hear 'artist', they say "Cool! Can you make an anime, like GUNDAM/Bleach/Death Note, but with all the cool stuff from <insert every existing anime series here>?"

Oh, and 'musician': "Awesome! Do you make DnB/Dubstep/House/Trance/<insert genre here>".

I blame the educational system. Also, generalization sucks. Just because I'm a C++-programmer-who-can-develop-games-and-also-happens-to-be-a-pixel/concept-artist-in-addition-to-being-able-to-play-the-guitar-and-create-chiptunes doesn't mean that I'm a haxxor-who-can-maek-all-games-and-also-happens-to-be-a-one-man-animation-team-in-addition-to-being-able-to-play-an-orchestrated-arrangement-with-one-toe-and-mix-party-music-with-a-food-processor. Where do they come up with this stuff?

In utter seriousness, if I could be paid just a dollar or two for each and every time I've had a highschool student ask me why I didn't try to make "Need for Unreal Quake Warfare 3 Auto: Skyrim", I'd be rolling in money.

OK, it's just highschool students (Young highschool students, usually the ones who only play games, never look into how they're made), but honestly, they get annoying… [/grumble]

Speaking of guitar

I play classical guitar, for anybody who didn't know. And don't go favoring an Electric by default just because it's Electric; because a classical guitar played well can produce a wonderfully pure, clean and harmonic sound. Of course, the volume is the main reason people disregard it in favor of the electric variants.

I've finally learned the proper musical notation in addition to the Tablature representation, but in the end I still rely on good ol' fashioned "Listen and Duplicate". Apparently I have a good ear for music; play me something a few times and I can pick out and play the melodic lines pretty accurately, with more accuracy on following attempts; practice makes perfect as always.

Funny story: The other day, I played in front of my family for the first time. They hadn't realized how far I'd come with the instrument. After a while they asked if I could play something more 'upbeat' (I was playing Blues, and some Castlevania inspired melodies that I was coming up with on the spot :3).

It then hit me that I hadn't actually been practicing anything 'upbeat' at all. But instead of telling them that, my finger brushed across the G string, second fret. Which sounded reminiscent of something. So I continued to play, and lo and behold, I found myself playing Winter Wrap Up, much to my dismay.

I sat there with a forced and weak grin on my face, hoping they didn't recognize it, but continued to play anyway. Everybody commented on how nice the tune was, and asked what it was called. I just said it was 'something I'd heard a while back' and excused myself.

From then on, I resolved to learn some traditional music that dwelt primarily in the Major Scale, so I wouldn't have to risk public humiliation on account of knowing only one 'happy' sounding song with some difficult-to-explain origins. I'm now studying some Flamenco guitar music, some of the Beatles music and also John Denver, in order to give the old-fashioned people something to like.

I've progressed my playing style to the point where I play a mix between chords and single notes, so I usually follow a pattern Chord-note-note-note Chord-note-note-note in 4/4 timing. Sounds really nice, and confuses people into thinking I'm playing some professional song that they just haven't heard before <3

I promise I'll make a recording of my playing one day, but only when I have a high-quality microphone. All the microphones I've gotten hold of so far make it sound like I'm playing an out-of-tune distorted-overdriven-electric-guitar with a fan blowing a gale-force wind in the background on every note.

End Matter

I have now secured my blog against being outdone by it's comments, and written a lot of things that few people will read. So:

Tl:Dr - Stuffhappenedandifyoucanhurtyourheadenoughtotryreadthisthenyoumayaswelltrytoreadtheactualblogdamnyou:3

Well, I'm left to the waiting game for now. *yawns*

Stats: 2234 words.

Disclaimer: Written at about 2AM in the morning on my third consecutive night of only getting 2~4 hours of sleep. So may contain traces of insanity. You have been warned.