I feel that once i figured out what made me truly happy, i started to revert back to my ways of being unhappy out of comfort. like i don't deserve to be happy therefore me working towards being happy is a useless and time wasting concept. i'm supposed to have a miserable and timewasting life due to the way i got brought up and the things i've heard over the course of my life. the main things i think about on a daily basis are things i will never want to get because i am not who deserves them
… being happily in love with a girl… being able to speak my mind everywhere i go… having great relationships because everybody loves me… having everyone laugh at my lame jokes or my sick jokes… having people want to open up to me… having people praise me for the daily work i do… everything. everything. everything.i am a jealous guy. when i see around, i want everything everyone else has. like that happy relationship, or that cool android tablet, or sick basketball skills, or a really yummy piece of chocolate ice cream. i don't like that i have this "outlet" on 64digits to write about anything i want and have no one inspect it. no one these days has the guts to truly analyze what i say, but instead want to flood me with their good intentions and "knowledge" and greeting card-sayings that make me want to kill myself. no one has the guts to say… why do you feel like that?everyone i know is such a coward, so much that they're not willing to admit they feel and think the same way. or even worse, have the guts to lie to me about it
i feel like i became a man of few words
Posted by NeutralReiddHotel on Oct. 25, 2015, 9:42 p.m.
Comments
I was attempting to keep the shit I have to say private to not call you out or attempt to cause further drama. I don't give half a shit what anyone's opinion is of me and you don't see me bitching for attention on the internet. Depression is real - if you have it, seek help. You're not special or original - most people here have gone through it but manage to not be total dickheads.
You aren't going to do shit and 3 years from now you'll be doing the same shit with your life unless you do something to fix it.And you are obviously the scared one who cannot speak to how you feel. You know nothing of others lives and cry because they don't know your problems. Fix yourself. You are broken.I don't care about warns or bans or any other shit. I say what I mean and I say what is true.well this got out of proportion, lets chill guys
yes, but don't get carried away.
Emoting extreme self inflation along with -supposed- manic depression for 10 years isn't okay. We've all experienced horrific things - family and friends dying, long term relationships that burn down in flames, infidelity, some of us experience extreme poverty or horribly illnesses or have been abused.
If you're asking for openness and honesty, take it.I'm sorry if I'm hurting anyone's feelings by being blunt, but literally complaining for attention and claiming "none of you know how it is or how hard it is" helps no one and is blatantly selfish. We aren't 12 anymore, grow up and get help.