**Be warned, this blog is a shitfest of everything from the last two months of my absence**
Well, shit, It's been a while, hasn't it? Almost two months? I disappear like that sometimes. Let me catch you all up.Life and Obligatory 64Depression-Well you know, life's bullshit. You guys remember my blog titled "Tears" going over my recent relationship problem. We were technically in some kinda of relationship purgatory still, or as she called it 'a break', until I decided I couldn't take it anymore and just called it all off until we felt like we could work again.This happened around the end of September.I was having some pretty hardcore anxiety issues up until about a week or two ago. Combine anxiety, depression, and stress on a constant basis, and your mind does funky things to your body.I went through a period of thinking I was going to have a heart attack due to tightness in my chest, pains, palpitations. I even thought I had heart disease. A few weeks later I started getting twitching in my side, which then spread all over my body in a day. I did some research, which then made me think I had ALS or MS. I essentially became a hypochondriac around this point, and it was horrible, knowing that there's nothing wrong with you, but panicking because your mind is telling you to. I hate having anxiety issues, I just can't stop thinking about things. Things in the past, things now, things to come, bad things, it's BAD. I wanted to kill myself at a few points, tried at a few points, cried to sleep at a few points, and began to feel detached from the real world at a few points. I began thinking I could find a way to turn back time and change things, maybe I could salvage my sanity and not be alone, friendless, a loser with talent.Nope.I began in early September trying to deal with my sorrow by buying temporary happiness. I needed something… something that would pick me up from the floor, and so I bought game after game after game, blowing through cash like drinking water. Money does not buy happiness, only temporary relief from whatever it is that's haunting you. What'd I get? That's addressed in the next section.But now I feel a bit better. I had to force myself to not let my anxiety control me. I don't care if I live long, or die tomorrow, but I don't want to die lonely and in agony, letting my memories and mind haunt and control me. That' just a no-go.I realize I can't do this alone, and my true savior arrives November 6th.
Life. The Good Life-My room has a name now.I call it the 'Battle Station'.Here's a panorama.
Also, back in September, I got the urge to play some of those awesome PS3 exclusives. The problem was I didn't have a PS3!So I bought one, and the following games.Infamous 2Killzone 2Killzone 3: Helghast Edition
Resistance: Fall of ManResistance 2Resistance 3StarhawkSSXUncharted Dual Pack (Drake's Fortune and UC2 GOTY Edition)Uncharted 3I made the following modifications to my controller using oil-based paint markers and skillz.
The writing on the left-hand side says "Death To The ISA" in Helghan.I'm gonna be honest. I fucking love Killzone.I also got more Xbox games and Gears of War stuff.
Including the Halo Reach Limited EditionAnd Soul Calibur V Collector's EditionAs for PC games, I actually haven't gamed on my laptop for some time until recently.I bought Dishonored and got NFS SHIFT 2 Unleashed for free off Origin.The Art Life-I won't splurge a whole section to this, and instead just post pictures of stuffs I did and things.But I will say I was in a horrible art block ONCE AGAIN for a while, and in return- I apologize to Alert- if he happens to see this blog and go through it, because I had a commission to do, and was unable to deliver.Basically… I should probably get my emotions and mentality in shape before I take on requests and commissions.Anyways. I've been keeping to my silhouette style, because I quite enjoy it, and can crank out whatever happens to be in my head in under 2 hours, and I find that to be great.
And here I have some traditional work that are of really bad quality.Acrylic on Canvas
Oil Pastel-done on four separate pieces of paper and combined together… like Tetris, mang.-
Acrylic on Canvas"I Am I"Priced at $100Submitted to the "Unibrow II Art Show" in Denver. 
I'm hoping I'll win, and at the very least, be accepted into the show. First place prize is $200. Hell, maybe somebody will buy it. One thing's for sure, this is as close as you guys will get to seeing my face on 64D.Hopefully this wasn't too much shit splurged into one blog. I love this place, figured I'd let you guys know I'm very much alive for now, before I happened to end up not very much alive.Edit: New stuff
Yeah. The reviews are making me even more excited.
I need to make 60 bucks. Quick.@LAR: I'm as big a Halo fan as I am a Gears fan, though Halo hasn't influenced me artistically as much as GoW and Unreal Tournament. So I owe a lot of what I do now to those games, and the artists. I may get the few Halo games I don't have so that I can have all of em. Just missing Wars, and ODST.
@KaBob: Halo 1 had and still has the best multiplayer out of all of em I'd say. The next being Halo2 since it keeps closer to Halo 1's roots, except the fucked up dual-wielding system. Halo Anniversary kinda brings a bit of this back, even if it runs on the Reach engine, which is fine by me. 3 shots to the head with the magnum fixes everything.@FSX: Thanks brah. Making timelapses is hard as hell. These two videos are the first timelapses I've ever made.@Acid: Alright. And man, when I get time. School just isn't letting me do shit really.@JID: I'm going to the midnight release since I've had it on reserve at Gamestop since March I think.I'm also actually really excited for Halo 4's MP, I just think it looks fresh, and finally has more than just a few armor parts, but stuff that actually counts.And man, I woulda got ACIII, but I had a choice between waiting for ACIII, or getting Dishonored. I got Dishonored. So ACIII will have to wait unfortunately :c.Also thanks.I have every Halo game except 3 of them. I still need Halo Anniversary Edition, Halo 3 ODST, and Halo Wars. I don't really want Halo wars though.
3 and Reach are the only ones I've touched. I played 3 with my uncle, doing a co-op legendary. I loved the ending, by the way. Reach, I pretty much just got for the multiplayer, but most of the players were fucking asshats who specialize in sniping, teabagging, and overall douchebaggery.
I've never been a fan of the Halo series, but their storytelling is surprisingly good for a shooter.Halo wars was actually pretty fun for me. That may be because i don't really play RTS's like that, i realize that people think it's an average game, and i have no comment on that.
I really wanted Halo Anniversary Edition, i might pick that up when it becomes really cheap. Never played ODST, but it looked really interestingedit: @eva, AC3 is really a much different game than the other ones, it's a great game in its own right, but it got a little too ambitious with it's design, i still love the game a lot, though i do miss italy and ezio a little. they've done a nice job at finally making stealth a game mechanic and making combat actually a moderate challenge. i'd seriously suggest it to anyone, even if they've never played an AC game before.and hadn't watched much on Halo 4's mp. only watched some forge stuff a while back.@JID: ODST's campaign is super neat, especially the bits where you're running around an abandoned city to moody saxophone.
yeah, that's what interested me, it seemed like a much more dark and moody game compared to the other Halo's, a friend of mine had it a while back and loved it and kept bugging me to get it.
I freaking@LAR: Yea I don't really want Wars either, I'd probably play it once just to see what it's all about, and never touch it again. Just there for the collection.
@Killin: That sniping, teabagging, and douchbaggery has been going on since HaloCE PC, when it finally got multiplayer.@JID: Anniversary is great, man. I think it's still like 30 bucks right now, but then again I got mine from BestBuy, so go-figure that.Also I haven't even beaten ACII yet, lol.@Rez: I honestly hated ODST, it felt like a maze after a while. Eventually I just kept backtracking into the same damn missions and said fuckit. But it is darker and grittier than the others. Most Halo games that don't feature Chief seem to be darker, since there's no guarantee anyone may live really. But with the regular Halo series, we KNOW Chief is gonna live pretty much. Still say Reach is the darkest of all of em though, but Halo4 is looking to be pretty deep itself.Tell me what you feel about Killzone 2 and 3, personally the story was fantastic in 2 and semi good in 1, but three… ugh it just destroys such an amazing universe for me. I hated 3, and I know a lot of people hated the "weighty" feeling in the second game, but personally I thought it was really refreshing to have such a distinct feel in a first person shooter. I thought 2 was the best the series has had to offer, and while 3 is pretty and has better set pieces, just, ugh, such a disappointing ending…
Also I'm waiting until the next Xbox is announced or comes out so I can buy a cheap 360 to play the Halo series I've been missing out on. (Especially Halo 4, looks super good). Halo has always been the game I love to play with friends at their houses, and that's exactly what I want it for since pretty much no other series does splitscreen anymore :(Edit: I hated AC1, then I heard AC2 was good, and I hated that, and now I don't trust the series at all.